Tag: selfreflection

Ways to stop worrying about what people think

As people grow, their preferences begin to change and they stop liking things that they used to like in the past. Yes, it could just be a process of growing up, but I also believe that one of the major reasons for change is the surrounding people. This means that majority of the changes are not made because there was a sudden change of heart but because of what other people think. I faced many situations like this as well where I wore an outfit that I personally really liked, but once my friends told me their negative opinions about my fashion sense, I felt extremely self-conscious for the rest of the day and chose to not ever wear it again in public. I realized as time passed, however, that it is extremely exhausting to make decisions based on other people’s perspectives and opinions, in addition to constantly adjusting my own style to meet the societal standards. Here are a few ways to stop worrying about what people think.

1. Stop judging other people’s preferences

Not everyone cares about every little thing in life. In fact, the only thing that catches a person’s eye is what he or she is currently interested in or worried about. If you are self-conscious about one part of yourself, that means that is the way you view other people. For example, let’s say that you are self-conscious about your weight and you feel as though your thighs are way too thick. You worrying that other people will think you are fat based on the way you define to be “fat” means that you categorize other people as “fat” and “skinny” when you just look at them. If you learn to stop categorizing people based on your own perceptions and judging them based on what you think, you will soon realize that there is no reason to be self-conscious. Since at that point you’ll stop seeing reasons to judge others, furthermore not see why you should be judged and be self-conscious.

2. YOLO

It is a known fact that everyone lives once (at least it is the only provable claim). If you think about it, the time of our life where we can express ourselves and accomplish the most things is in our 10s and 20s. There is just such a limited amount of time to shine and live as you want. Yes, you can try to live your life when you’re older, but there will be less opportunities that are given and the situation will be much better if you try to accomplish the tasks when you are younger. That’s why there is absolutely no reason to waste the peak time of your life by worrying about what people think and adjusting to their perspectives. There are just so many different ways to enjoy life if we make decisions for our own happiness rather than for others. Therefore, since we have the one life to live, let’s live it to the fullest.

3. Have a moment to yourself

Trying to constantly live a life where you are surrounded by people, especially if you’re self conscious, may not be healthy for your mental health. This means that you will never be able to express yourself completely, always feeling unhappy and empty on the inside. Having a separate moment for yourself can be healthy and allow you to feel good about yourself again. Afterwards, you may realize that there is absolutely no reason to restrict yourself from feeling happy by trying to meet societal standards (unless that will break a law or negatively impact society). Stepping back a little to have a moment to yourself can be good to your mental health and could later change the way you choose to live.

Apps I recommend

Although I changed my phone multiple times, I’ve owned a smartphone since 8th grade (so for around 3-4 years). Honestly, smartphones are mostly used as time killers, but there were a few apps that I used that I truly enjoyed using. They are not very relevant to education and being productive, but these apps are ones I really wanted to recommend to others.

1. Questions Diary

The reason I placed this app first is because it is definitely not very widely-known. I just recently discovered this app and I fell in love. What this app is that it asks you a question daily for 365 days. You type your answer to each respective question down every day. Then, a year later, it will ask you the same question again and you’ll be able to see how much you’ve changed over the year (for the better or for worse). The questions are based on your views and thoughts on certain scenarios. I think this is a great app to express your true feelings – ones that are hidden from other people – because letting it all out actually helps with relieving stress and sadness.

2. Google Opinion Rewards

This app isn’t related to psychology, but it’s related to money. Majority of the apps in the play store and the app store is free. However, the better-quality, more “pro”-like apps are not free and require money to be downloaded. However, I personally don’t have a card to input into my phone so I am unable to purchase anything that requires money (including movies, songs, and apps that cost money). As for this app, answering some questions in surveys that Google provides gives you money that is added to your Google Play account. So far, I was able to earn up to around $1 which opens up to a lot of apps that I could purchase now. Since the surveys are quick and easy, I think this is a great app to have.

3. VSCO

This is a very popular photo editing app that many, many people use. The reason I’m recommending this is because it is capable of changing the photos to match any mood and theme. For example, if you want your photo to be more calm and moody (?), then you can use the editing tools to adjust the brightness and contrast, etc., to make your photo that way. This is the only photo editing app that I use since it fits so perfectly with what I desire in a editing app. I know this app is popular, but if you love editing photos and don’t have this app, it’s a must-get.

4. Google Photos

This is another super popular app that a lot of people use as their photo backup. The reason why I use this, however, is different from many other’s usage of this app. If you own all apple devices, such as the iPhone, iPad, MacBook, Apple Watch, AirPods, etc., there is airdrop which is extremely convenient when sharing documents between each device. However, if you’re like me and you own an iPad (Apple device) and a Note 9 (Samsung device), it is extremely difficult to share files such as photos and videos. I found that Google Photos is the most convenient to use since you can back up all of the photos and videos to your account and then download those into your other device. For example, if I took photos on my phone and I want them on my iPad, I back up all of my photos from my phone into my Google account using Google photos. Then, I go on my iPad and download those backed-up photos from the app to my Gallery. This is still a very gruesome process, but this is the most convenient way I know. If you by any chance know a more effective way, please teach me!